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Confessiones (PL)

CAPUT XVI. Categorias Aristotelis et liberalium artium libros per se intellexit.

28. Et quid mihi proderat quod annos natus ferme viginti, cum in manus meas venissent Aristotelica quaedam, quas appellant decem Categorias; quarum nomine, cum eas rhetor Carthaginensis magister meus buccis typho crepantibus commemoraret, et alii qui docti habebantur, tanquam in nescio quid magnum et divinum suspensus inhiabam; legi eas solus et intellexi? Quas cum contulissem cum eis qui se dicebant vix eas, magistris eruditissimis, non loquentibus tantum, sed multa in pulvere depingentibus, intellexisse; nihil inde aliud mihi dicere potuerunt, quam ego solus apud meipsum legens cognoveram, et satis aperte mihi videbantur loquentes de substantiis, sicuti est homo; et quae in illis essent, sicuti est figura hominis; qualis sit et statura, quot pedum sit; et cognatio, cujus frater sit; aut ubi sit constitutus; aut quando natus; aut stet, aut sedeat; aut calceatus vel armatus sit; aut aliquid faciat; aut patiatur aliquid: et quaecumque in his novem generibus, quorum exempli gratia quaedam posui, vel in ipso substantiae genere innumerabilia reperiuntur.

29. Quid hoc mihi proderat, quando et oberat? cum etiam te, Deus meus, mirabiliter simplicem atque incommutabilem, illis decem praedicamentis putans quidquid esset omnino comprehensum, sic intelligere [Col. 0705] conarer, quasi et tu subjectus esses magnitudini tuae aut pulchritudini, ut illa essent in te quasi in subjecto, sicut in corpore; cum tua magnitudo et tua pulchritudo tu ipse sis: corpus autem non eo sit magnum et pulchrum quo corpus est; quia etsi minus magnum et minus pulchrum esset, nihilominus corpus esset. Falsitas enim erat quam de te cogitabam, non veritas; et figmenta miseriae meae, non firmamenta beatitudinis tuae. Jusseras enim, et ita fiebat in me, ut terra spinas et tribulos pareret mihi, et cum labore pervenirem ad panem meum ¹.

30. Et quid mihi proderat quod omnes libros artium quas liberales vocant, tunc nequissimus malarum cupiditatum servus per meipsum legi et intellexi, quoscumque legere potui? Et gaudebam in eis, et nesciebam unde esset quidquid ibi verum et certum esset. Dorsum enim habebam ad lumen, et ad ea quae illuminantur, faciem: unde ipsa facies mea, qua illuminata cernebam, non illuminabatur. Quidquid de arte loquendi et disserendi, quidquid de dimensionibus figurarum, et de musicis et de numeris, sine magna difficultate, nullo hominum tradente intellexi, scis tu, Domine Deus meus; quia et celeritas intelligendi, et dispiciendi acumen, donum tuum est: sed non inde sacrificabam tibi. Itaque mihi non ad usum, sed ad perniciem magis valebat, quia tam bonam partem substantiae meae sategi habere in potestate: et fortitudinem meam non ad te custodiebam ²; sed profectus sum abs te in longinquam regionem, ut eam dissiparem in meretrices cupiditates (Luc. XV, 12, 13, [Col. 0706] 30). Nam quid mihi proderat bona res, non utenti bene? Non enim sentiebam illas artes etiam ab studiosis et ingeniosis difficillime intelligi, nisi cum eis easdem conabar exponere; et erat ille excellentissimus in eis, qui me exponentem non tardius sequeretur.

31. Sed quid mihi hoc proderat, putanti quod tu, Domine Deus veritas, corpus esses lucidum et immensum, et ego frustum de illo corpore? Nimia perversitas! sed sic eram. Nec erubesco, Deus meus, confiteri tibi in me misericordias tuas, et invocare te, qui non erubui tunc profiteri hominibus blasphemias meas, et latrare adversum te. Quid ergo mihi tunc proderat ingenium per illas doctrinas agile, et nullo adminiculo humani magisterii tot nodosissimi libri enodati, cum deformiter et sacrilega turpitudine in doctrina pietatis errarem? Aut quid tantum oberat parvulis tuis longe tardius ingenium, cum a te longe non recederent, ut in nido Ecclesiae tuae tuti plumescerent, et alas charitatis alimento sanae fidei nutrirent? O Domine, Deus noster, in velamento alarum tuarum speremus ³; et protege nos, et porta nos. Tu portabis et parvulos, et usque ad canos tu portabis

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The Confessions of St. Augustin In Thirteen Books

Chapter XVI.--He Very Easily Understood the Liberal Arts and the Categories of Aristotle, But Without True Fruit.

28. And what did it profit me that, when scarce twenty years old, a book of Aristotle's, entitled The Ten Predicaments, fell into my hands,--on whose very name I hung as on something great and divine, when my rhetoric master of Carthage, and others who were esteemed learned, referred to it with cheeks swelling with pride,--I read it alone and understood it? And on my conferring with others, who said that with the assistance of very able masters--who not only explained it orally, but drew many things in the dust ¹ --they scarcely understood it, and could tell me no more about it than I had acquired in reading it by myself alone? And the book appeared to me to speak plainly enough of substances, such as man is, and of their qualities,--such as the figure of a man, of what kind it is; and his stature, how many feet high; and his relationship, whose brother he is; or where placed, or when born; or whether he stands or sits, or is shod or armed, or does or suffers anything; and whatever innumerable things might be classed under these nine categories, ² --of which I have given some examples,--or under that chief category of substance.

29. What did all this profit me, seeing it even hindered me, when, imagining that whatsoever existed was comprehended in those ten categories, I tried so to understand, O my God, Thy wonderful and unchangeable unity as if Thou also hadst been subjected to Thine own greatness or beauty, so that they should exist in Thee as their subject, like as in bodies, whereas Thou Thyself art Thy greatness and beauty? But a body is not great or fair because it is a body, seeing that, though it were less great or fair, it should nevertheless be a body. But that which I had conceived of Thee was falsehood, not truth,--fictions of my misery, not the supports of Thy blessedness. For Thou hadst commanded, and it was done in me, that the earth should bring forth briars and thorns to me, ³ and that with labour I should get my bread. ⁴

30. And what did it profit me that I, the base slave of vile affections, read unaided, and understood, all the books that I could get of the so-called liberal arts? And I took delight in them, but knew not whence came whatever in them was true and certain. For my back then was to the light, and my face towards the things enlightened; whence my face, with which I discerned the things enlightened, was not itself enlightened. Whatever was written either on rhetoric or logic, geometry, music, or arithmetic, did I, without any great difficulty, and without the teaching of any man, understand, as Thou knowest, O Lord my God, because both quickness of comprehension and acuteness of perception are Thy gifts. Yet did I not thereupon sacrifice to Thee. So, then, it served not to my use, but rather to my destruction, since I went about to get so good a portion of my substance ⁵ into my own power; and I kept not my strength for Thee, ⁶ but went away from Thee into a far country, to waste it upon harlotries. ⁷ For what did good abilities profit me, if I did not employ them to good uses? For I did not perceive that those arts were acquired with great difficulty, even by the studious and those gifted with genius, until I endeavoured to explain them to such; and he was the most proficient in them who followed my explanations not too slowly.

31. But what did this profit me, supposing that Thou, O Lord God, the Truth, wert a bright and vast body, ⁸ and I a piece of that body? Perverseness too great! But such was I. Nor do I blush, O my God, to confess to Thee Thy mercies towards me, and to call upon Thee--I, who blushed not then to avow before men my blasphemies, and to bark against Thee. What profited me then my nimble wit in those sciences and all those knotty volumes, disentangled by me without help from a human master, seeing that I erred so odiously, and with such sacrilegious baseness, in the doctrine of piety? Or what impediment was it to Thy little ones to have a far slower wit, seeing that they departed not far from Thee, that in the nest of Thy Church they might safely become fledged, and nourish the wings of charity by the food of a sound faith? O Lord our God, under the shadow of Thy wings let us hope, ⁹ defend us, and carry us. Thou wilt carry us both when little, and even to grey hairs wilt Thou carry us; ¹⁰ for our firmness, when it is Thou, then is it firmness; but when it is our own, then it is infirmity. Our good lives always with Thee, from which when we are averted we are perverted. Let us now, O Lord, return, that we be not overturned, because with Thee our good lives without any eclipse, which good Thou Thyself art. ¹¹ And we need not fear lest we should find no place unto which to return because we fell away from it; for when we were absent, our home--Thy Eternity--fell not.