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The Life of Malchus, the Captive Monk

3.

My son, said he, I used to farm a bit of ground at Nisibis ¹ and was an only son. My parents regarding me as the heir and the only survivor of their race, wished to force me into marriage, but I said I would rather be a monk. How my father threatened and my mother coaxed me to betray my chastity requires no other proof than the fact that I fled from home and parents. I could not go to the East because Persia was close by and P. 316 the frontiers were guarded by the soldiers of Rome; I therefore turned my steps to the West, taking with me some little provision for the journey, but barely sufficient to ward off destitution. To be brief, I came at last to the desert of Chalcis ² which is situate between Immæ and Beroa farther south. There, finding some monks, I placed myself under their direction, earning my livelihood by the labour of my hands, and curbing the wantonness of the flesh by fasting. After many years the desire came over me to return to my country, and stay with my mother and cheer her widowhood while she lived (for my father, as I had already heard, was dead), and then to sell the little property and give part to the poor, settle part on the monasteries and (I blush to confess my faithlessness) keep some to spend in comforts for myself. My abbot began to cry out that it was a temptation of the devil, and that under fair pretexts some snare of the old enemy lay hid. It was, he declared, a case of the dog returning to his vomit. Many monks, he said, had been deceived by such suggestions, for the devil never showed himself openly. He set before me many examples from the Scriptures, and told me that even Adam and Eve in the beginning had been overthrown by him through the hope of becoming gods. When he failed to convince me he fell upon his knees and besought me not to forsake him, nor ruin myself by looking back after putting my hand to the plough. Unhappily for myself I had the misfortune to conquer my adviser. I thought he was seeking not my salvation but his own comfort. So he followed me from the monastery as if he had been going to a funeral, and at last bade me farewell, saying, “I see that you bear the brand of a son of Satan. I do not ask your reasons nor take your excuses. The sheep which forsakes its fellows is at once exposed to the jaws of the wolf.”

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Vita Malchi monachi captivi

III

[Malchi historia.]

«Ego», inquit, «mi nate, Nisibeni agelli colonus, solus parentibus fui. Qui cum me quasi stirpem generis sui et heredem familiae ad nuptias cogerent, monachum potius me velle esse respondi. Quantis pater minis, quantis mater blanditiis persecuti sint, ut pudicitiam proderem, haec res sola indicio est, quod et domum et parentes fugi. Et quia ad orientem ire non poteram propter vicinam Persidem et Romanorum militum custodiam, ad occidentem verti pedes pauxillum nescioquid portans viatici, quod me ab inopia tantum defenderet. Quid multa? Perveni tandem ad eremum Calchidos, quae inter Immas et Beroeam magis ad austrum sita est. Ibi repertis monachis eorum me magisterio tradidi manuum labore victum quaeritans lasciviamque carnis refrenans ieiuniis.

Post multos annos incidit mihi cogitatio, ut ad patriam pergerem et, dum adhuc viveret mater (iam enim patrem mortuum audieram), solarer viduitatem eius et exinde venumdata possessiuncula partem erogarem pauperibus, partem monasterio constituerem - (quid erubesco confiteri infidelitatem meam?) partem in sumptuum meorum solacia reservarem. Ob hoc clamare coepit abbas meus diaboli esse temptationem et sub honestae rei occasione latere antiqui hostis astutias. Hoc esse canem reverti ad vomitum suum; sic multos monachorum deceptos; numquam diabolum aperta fronte se prodere. Proponebat mihi exempla de scripturis plurima, inter quae illud, quod initio Adam quoque et Evam spe divinitatis supplantaverit. Et cum persuadere non posset, provolutus genibus obsecrabat, ne se desererem, ne me perderem, ne aratrum tenens post tergum respicerem. Vae mihi misero: vici monitorem pessima victoria reputans illum non meam salutem, sed suum solacium quaerere. Prosecutus ergo me de monasterio, quasi funus efferret, et ad extremum valedicens ‹Video›, ait, ‹te, fili, Satanae notatum cauterio. Non quaero causas; excusationes non recipio. Ovis, quae de ovili egreditur, lupi statim morsibus patet.›